Australians Among the World's Most Resistant to Couples Counselling

It is estimated that evidence-based therapy works for about 70% of couples, with long-lasting positive changes, so why are Australian couples so resistant to couples counselling?

One thing that may be keeping couples from entering the therapy room is a fear that the therapist will take their spouse’s side. Heading to counselling is exposing and takes a lot of courage.

Research conducted by The Australian Institute of Family Studies reveals the reasoning behind attending relationship counselling can be varied. According to the study, 89 per cent of men and 77 per cent of women attended counselling with the intention to remain in the relationship. It was also found that 23 per cent of women and 11 per cent of men who participated in relationship counselling were not attending for the purposes of reconciliation but instead intended to separate or to remain separated. Relationships Australia shared that therapy often doesn’t work if domestic violence is present, if people came to counselling just to tell their partner they were leaving them, or if they were simply unable to see any perspective other than their own.

Poor mental health is a strong predictor of relationship breakdown, as is the presence of dependent children, domestic violence, or if only one partner smokes. Yet personality differences, age, ethnicity, education, and drinking behaviours have little bearing on relationship breakdowns. Finding the right couples therapy Melbourne provider is a hot topic.

Couples conflict can be a high stakes affair with each party bringing their own histories and emotions, fears and desires. Learning more about the pros and cons of couples counselling is the first step to addressing these issues.

What Is Couples Counselling?

Couples counselling provides a professionally facilitated environment to help couples explore their relationship and each of their roles in it. With a third party to help direct the discourse, individuals gain insight into where their partnership is strongest and which patterns of behaviour are damaging their relationship. A relationship counsellor in Melbourne will help the couple identify sources of tension in their relationship and highlight how it can affect others around them, particularly their children.

How Does Couples Counselling Work?

Relationship counsellors will first seek to gain an understanding of the main problems being experienced by the couple. Some of the initial questions may include:

-- What are the particular issues you have been experiencing as a couple?

Have these issues been a long term or short term problem in the relationship?

Have there been previous attempts to resolve the issues? How?

-- What do both parties want for the future relationship?

For the first session of marriage counselling, Melbourne couples usually attend together. Individual counselling is available in conjunction with further couples counselling. Techniques used by relationship counsellors to help the couple work on their relationship include:

-- Creating a safe environment for each party to share their feelings

-- Prompting and facilitating open and frank discussions

-- Communication and behaviour pattern analysis

-- Suggesting strategies to improve the relationship

-- Encouraging role play for better understanding and for modelling purposes

Finding a Marriage Counsellor in Melbourne

For couples interested in meeting with a counsellor and discussing how they might be able to help move their relationship forward, couples counselling Melbourne is the next step.